Texting with Douglas

Douglas went to Texas to work on a ranch and it turns out he is in the Four corners area.  It is very peaceful he says.  He seems to be enjoying himself quite a bit.  He says he is learning how to drive, something he strongly resisted.  The buildings on the ranch are all smaller than 20 feet to a side to avoid taxes so it is an interesting little compound, one building for the kitchen and dining, one building for the living room, various buildings for bedrooms.  Sounds quaint and rustic.

I am still not really clear on what he is doing down there.  He was blathering on about hoping to see wolves.  I think he is helping to clear brush etc.  He claims he is very chilled out and he really likes how quiet and calm it is.  I do think he is a nature kind of guy, this city living we have is pretty stressful for him.  Maybe he is finding a career path! 

Pride Filled Me

Went to vote this AM, got up early to avoid the lines, (wasn't successful, isn't that totally the best problem to have in a democracy) and I got to introduce my 18 yo to voting. It made me so proud to see him step up and do his civic duty. I don't care who he votes for, so long as he votes. My other sons first voted at college and so I didn't get to witness them. My older girls have challenges so don't vote. So it was pretty neat to have him by my side in line and this year get to step up and have his voice heard. (I always take my kids to vote with me even before they can do it themselves).

Then walking back from the polling place he was telling me about his new job. His boss likes him so much already that he has increased his hours this first week! Douglass told me his boss likes his work because he is "precise and methodical", those were the exact quoted words. This from one of my children who has struggled mightily with impulse control his whole life. I just swelled with pride to hear that. The years of redirection, therapy, homeschooling, supportive church family partners and life teaching seem to be paying off! 4-6 years ago this was one I was afraid was not going to make it in the adult world outside of a very structured environment. 3 years ago I thought that environment was going to be jail because of his explosive temper and violent ways of expressing himself. 1 year ago I had despaired of him ever having ambition, goals and a desire for a better life. Today he is a fine young man, caring and empathetic, able to problem solve before exploding, and with definite dreams about his future. He is maturing well. Thank you God.

Survival

I haven't posted much about our financial problems, there is too much of that depressing news in the papers and on the telly. But we are in big financial doodoo.

I know a lot of people are also here. For us it was not extravagant spending, we don't have fancy cars or expensive nick-knacks, but a series of job losses over a number of years that depleted all our reserves. So now that my DH is facing further job erosion we have nothing left to fall back on.

Survival mode is in full swing, but I am scared it will not be enough. The whole world economy is scary. Just in time for Halloween, only I am afraid it will not go away come Nov. 1!!

The Squeeze is On!

Well, we seem to have been hit on all sides. First of all the economy sucks and as an independent consultant my husband is really feeling the squeeze, folks don't want to invest in new technology updates when they aren't sure what the next business cycle is going to bring. Second, I just started a new job and that is making us all readjust our already tight schedules. Third we have had major issues and thus staffings on two of our kids that are in residential placements, one about 3 hours south of us and the other 2 states over and about 5.5 hours away. Fourth, to top it all off my dh's mother suffered another stroke and now we all have to decide long distance what the future holds in terms of staying in the home, etc. It's been a crazy week and a half, I will try to post details on all this later, but we'll see. Right now, after an emotional 3 hour staffing and then a 5.5 hour drive home I am exhausted and just want to sleep.

Achoo!

I have been in the throes of a sneezing, wheezing, eyes running, nose dripping allergy attack for several days now. It always happens in the Spring just as the last of the trees are blooming. Often it coincides with Easter and I am a mess for Easter Sunday and can't even help hide or find the Easter eggs. This year with Easter so early that was fine. But the last few days have been a bit brutal. With more cold weather and rain coming in for the next few days I am hoping a lot of the pollen will be tamped down and I can go out side again. My bulb gardens are in full flower and I have to view them from the window, sniff, sniff, achoo!

Well, I got the job, we finalize paperwork and details on Tuesday. I am not sure why I am not more excited. I think I just don't do change all that well, even when I initiate it and will benefit from the change. I am looking forward to getting to work, I have lots of ideas. It will also be so nice to have some co-workers again. Since we no longer home school, my social life has become smaller.

Kendra is having a birthday sleepover and the girls just got back from seeing "Horton hears a Who", their very own choice of movie. Maybe next post i will put up some pictures of her room. She has a fantastically funny decorating sense. It is odd, but it works. She is so her own person, no following the crowd for her.

Since I took the anti-histamine to stop sneezing long enough to get anything done, I am now so sleepy that I can't keep my head up and I think I am off to bed, hoping to get to sleep before the sneezing starts again.

Out in the Garden

What a glorious day, actually another one since yesterday was glorious as well. The trees are all flowering, we have Bradford pears, red buds, dogwoods and magnolia trees all gloriously in bloom up and down the streets. On Sunday Dancing Baby Girl got all excited when we drove down one street because we were in a white tunnel of Bradford Pear blossoms.

I am so proud of myself, I have persevered and gotten my project from idea to reality. I made myself a raised bed garden in the back yard. I used all materials we already had. It took a lot of work but it is ready for transplanting the seedlings.

Now will actually come the hard part, trying to keep the rabbits and squirrels from destroying my hard work. Anyone have any words of wisdom. I am currently threatening to keep the dog outside all summer to guard my plants. But as that is not realistic what are some other methods I could employ? I don't mind sharing but these critters are ravenous and will eat the seedlings before they even produce.

On another note I haven't heard anything on the job front. It is making me a little nervous. We need me to have this job or a job, but this is the one I want. I am trying not to get all anxious about it and just let life flow. I have never been very good at that.

Ironic Break

We have been very busy here, lots of things going on.

But now that our team is out of the NCAA playoffs we don't HAVE to watch basketball till late in the night. Of course, at least some of us still will but attendance on the TV room couch will not be mandatory!

Most of my time at the end of last week and the weekend was taken up with teaching other people how to blog. Nothing like the new convert to get out and proselytize:) It was fun but demanding as we were setting up a private group of blogs and I got to be the administrator with all of the admin tasks to accomplish.

Other news on the horizon, I have two jobs that I have to consider and we have been weighing the pros and cons here. So many choices, so many people's needs to factor in. I have been tossing around going back to school and getting my MSSW. I have found a school that interests me and have been working out details. But we have also been struggling with a lot of finance issues and my husband's business is very effected by the downturn in the economy as many businesses put off technology upgrades whenever they view a questionable future.

Both of these jobs popped up this weekend and they are almost a perfect match for me. One is to be a full time Parent Recruiter/Trainer for a private therapeutic foster care program and the other is to be a part time Recruiter/Certification Specialist for another wonderful therapeutic foster care program. Both of these are located in my city, actually in my end of town! Since I have been a freelance trainer for many years now I have actually worked with both programs.

The dilemna? Well, I don't really want to work full-time as we have so much on our plate with 3 special needs young adults, 2 of whom we retain guardianship over and the other one we just wind up being responsible for, and my youngest child is just finishing her first year of high school so I do lots of schlepping around for her and her activities. Not to mention, my 3 yo former foster daughter is still a big part of our lives and spends most weekends with us, lots of time extended weekends. But the full time job offers benefits and one of the things that is killing us is paying for health insurance through my husband's business. The part time job is actually far more attractive in many ways but I am not sure that it will answer the financial issues. However with the part time job I could still go back to school and get my MSSW.

Its not a bad dilemna to have, as my darling teenage daughter sarcastically pointed out the local burger place is hiring night managers so there are jobs everywhere, but not good jobs like these that fit my profile so well. These jobs come along rarely so I have to jump one way or the other.

It is even more complicated by the fact that my dh is not exactly excited about me working, full time or part time. I am an assistance to him in his business and have actually given presentations and done some teaching/training for his clients. I do some of the paperwork, the finances, and edit his white papers before publication. I think I could still do a lot of this with a part time job. He is rightly concerned about job creep, as in part time job becoming more full time with out full pay. One good argument from his perspective for me getting a job is that I would not be able to foster also and he is feeling very done with the whole state system and foster care in general, although not the kids, just the system, but they are indivisable unfortunately.

So my mind is spinning around and around. I have one interview on Friday and the other place and I are playing phone tag to set up an interview. Last night at dinner I enlisted everyone's help to make a list of pros and cons for all 3 options, no job, part-time job, and full-time job. It didn't really help me but I think my daughter enjoyed feeling included in the decision making process.

Anyone out there have any opinions? reflections on their own experiences with juggling everything?

This will not be the first time I have worked, but since I got very ill in 2000 and quit work after a cancer scare and a hysterectomy it will be the first time I have been an employee again instead of an independent contactor.