Sunday, March 16, 2008

Surgeries, Special Needs, and Anxieties

I have spent the afternoon getting ready to go to the Children's Hospital tomorrow, as my 14 yo Kendra is going to have some diagnostic tests done that involve a little surgery. We won't actually have the surgery tomorrow, but the surgery is scheduled for Tuesday at 7 AM and the hospital is over 2 hours away, so we are driving up tomorrow and spending the night in a hotel.

This surgery is causing me all sorts of anxieties and I am not totally sure why. She has had this proceedure at least 3 other times in her life and it is not any more dangerous than ever going under anethesia is. I guess I am worried about what they might find.

We know something is wrong with her digestive system, we have known that since her ultrasound in utero, she has seen a multitude of specialists, had surgery several times, been on special diets all her life and yet 14, almost 15 years later not a one of the specialists has been able to give us definitive answer about what is wrong and how to fix it. WE want some answers, we want a course of treatment that will lead to an improvement in her overall quality of life, and we want it sometime before she becomes an adult.

Having parented kids with speical needs, both as an adoptive, foster and (birth, first, regular, whatever) mom I know just how elusive that diagnosis and course of treatment can be. But it is still immensely frustrating to have to go through all of this and not have answers. Especially as she is getting to the age when I fear her own issues with fitting in and being part of the peer group may make her resistant to suggested therapies, or send her seeking her own self-mediactions for the ongoing pain and discomfort.

Anyway wish us luck and I won't be around for a couple of days, I expect to be back posting on Wednesday if not very late Tuesday.

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